Tie a Day, Number 85

Last Thursday I wore this interestingly subtle tie. The design on the tie is quite intricate with paisley, but the similarities in the colors allow the tie to be a bit more laid back than some of its brighter counterparts could ever possibly pull off. Not really a memorable tie, but a good choice for the day.

As I had mentioned, the day before, on Wednesday, was Amy's birthday. Being prepared for anything, or at least I thought I was, I asked her where she would like to go for her birthday dinner. She told me she wanted to go to the Cinema Cafe and see Alice in Wonderland with the kids.

It sounded like a great plan, so we rolled in there early enough to get a good table. As soon as we walked in the doors, Sam says he doesn't feel well. I really didn't give it much thought because we had just had cake, and he is 6, so sometimes I try to use my Jedi Mind Trick where I tell him that he feels ok, and I wave my hand like I am casting a spell on him.

Five minutes into the movie, he runs off to the bathroom with Amy and gets sick. I realized at this point that I really need to perfect my Jedi Mind Trick. Obi Wan makes it look so simple.

After Sam and Amy returned to the table, I became confused. I had forgotten all about the movie, but instead was worried about what to do next. Is Sam really sick? Was the cake bad? I ate two pieces and the rest of the family only had one. How in the world was I going to get home with a sick kid in my new mini van? If everyone else got sick too, what would I do then? Do I have any plastic bags in the vehicle?

When Sam made his second trip to the bathroom, I knew it was time to get him home fast. I grabbed Sam and told Amy to ask her mom to bring her and the other two kids home when the movie was over. Being a gambling man, I figured that I had 20 min to get Sam home before he would no longer be able to contain himself.

The trip time from the Cinema Cafe to our house is approximately 15- 20 minutes. The entire time home Sam was having intense stomach cramps while moaning and screaming in pain. Sitting behind me in his booster seat, I tried to hold his hand while I drove home as he writhed in agony.

It is an oddly helpless feeling when you can't do anything but drive and tell your child to practice slow, deep breathing exercises to keep his stomach from cramping. All the while you are driving as fast as you can, avoiding all bumps, sharp turns or sudden stops.

He made it.

While Amy's birthday dinner may not have been what was planned, it will certainly never be forgotten.

Tie a Day, Number 66

With skill and patience that I did not know he possessed, Sam slipped in front of the camera on Thursday morning for the perfect Photo Hog shot. His timing was perfect!

Calvin shouted, “Sam!”

I could only smile. There is just a hint of genius in a move like that, and some insight into Sam’s 6 year old personality, and I love it.

Thursday’s tie is the only Valentine’s Day tie I own. A nice little Looney Tunes tie with Pepé Le Pew and that poor little cat that he always sexually harasses. That behavior always amused me as a child, but now I know it is inappropriate (But I still think the cartoon is funny!).

Tie a Day, Number 57

Sam ran into my bedroom early Wednesday morning ready to pick out a tie for me to wear. I had to explain to him that I had already ironed the shirt that matched the tie that I picked out for the day. Because I had my stuff ready to go, I suggested that he choose a tie for the next day.

I don’t know exactly what he looks for when selecting ties, but he is very thorough and checks out all of the available ties before deciding. He managed to find the one Christmas tie that I missed during the holiday tie parade in December.

“Oh, Dad! Wear this tie with the candy canes on it. I like this one!”

People without young children do not understand how hard it can be to explain things to them. Sam could not accept that it was not socially acceptable to wear holiday attire once the season has passed.

“I like candy canes. Why can’t you wear this tie?”

I think I did what any parent does when they don’t really have an answer, or don’t have the time to adequately explain the situation, I made up a story, “Well Sam, you see, a long time ago they made a law to prevent people from celebrating holidays after the holiday has passed. This way it keeps holidays special. You wouldn’t want me to go to jail for breaking the law, would you?”

Only slightly disappointed, he picked out two ties for my next two tie wearing days.

The tie that Sam had me wear on Thursday was one of only three solid color ties that I own. This tie is silver silk and highly reflective. Almost mirror like, this tie is perfect for communicating with passing aircraft if you happen to find yourself stranded in the wilderness. This silver beauty could be a valuable and adaptable part of your survival kit (mirror, tourniquet, rope, small lasso), and it can serve double duty as a good looking tie for a night on the town.

The Silver Surfer could wear this tie...

Tie a Day, Number 54

Sam rushed up the stairs this morning to make sure he got to help me pick out my tie. I was barely out of the shower and had to remind him that he already picked out today’s tie yesterday. He was thrilled that he was able to dress Dad for the second day in a row. I may have started a trend with him.

This is the Calvin tie. This tie has a repeated picture of my oldest son Calvin staggered across the front of it. He was two in this picture and I am pretty sure I received this as my back to school gift from Amy in 2000.

Today, Calvin is eleven and almost as big as me. Soon he will be bigger, and I will make him kneel when he talks to me. I am not sure how they figure these things out, but according to the Doctor, Calvin should be 6’ 3” someday. All that height skipping right over me in the family tree…

Amy laughs because she says I falsified a legal document just so I can claim my true height to be more than reality. It is not my fault that the DMV has a flawed licensing system. Here’s some news for you, I don’t weight 160 pounds either! Stick that in your document falsifier…

I can’t help but feel like I have cheated Savannah today. I talked about her brothers, but today is her birthday. My baby girl is eight. She may be too old to be called that by anyone, except me, because no matter what- she will always be my baby girl.

I can call her that because I got to deliver her. It was one of the most special times in my life. In the delivery room, the nurse practitioner asked me if I wanted to deliver her. Amy had an uncomplicated pregnancy, and since things were going smoothly, I was ready and jumped at the chance. And when Savannah was born, I was the first to hold her. I feel like I have had to let her go just a little every day since.

Happy Birthday Savannah.

Tie a Day, Number 53

Sam, my six year old son, asked me yesterday if he could help me pick out a tie to wear. Of course, I said, “Yes!”

I tried to narrow down his choices from the remaining 80 or so ties I still have not worn, but he was having none of that, he wanted to see all of his choices. I was a little worried because I had already ironed my shirt and I was afraid that he would pick a tie that completely clashed with what I had prepared. Luckily, I remembered the golden rule of men’s wear, as long as you wear solid colors almost any tie will work. This is how I came to place my fate in the hands of a child who wears horizontal and vertical stripes together in the same shirt and pants combination.

I know that what Sam wears he likes, and that is much more important than matching. So I let him pick out his clothes while he can still get away with that approach. Once you get a little older, everyone offers their opinion, but when you are six, people say things like, “Awesome Transformers shirt!” And isn’t that all that really matters?

In the end, he gave me a choice. I could wear the Calvin and Hobbes tie today, or the tie that I have that has a picture of his brother, Calvin on it. Whichever tie I didn’t wear today, I have to wear tomorrow.

This Calvin and Hobbes tie is special to me because my wife Amy gave it to me when I was still teaching Kindergarten, before we were married. I believe it was 1994. We have always loved the Calvin and Hobbes comics and joked that our child would end up to be exactly like the Calvin in the strip. After we found out that Amy was pregnant, we had months of discussions on possible baby names (I wanted to carry on the family name with the 5^th in the Doss male series, and Amy did not) we could only find common ground with one name, Calvin. This is how we named our first son (as a compromise he has my middle name; that is as far as she would go).

Calvin was a much better name than the extreme name that I picked out. I only made it up to force Amy to see what great mistake it would be to pass on my name. The crazy name that I adopted involved clicks, a whistle and a smoochy sound strung together to form a completely unspellable name. The idea was that if I wouldn’t budge on the ridiculous extreme name, then she would have to give up and and the family name would live on.

Amy is too smart for me and knew I would fold; and I am glad. But it still makes me laugh to think of a teacher on nthe first day of school trying to call roll and reaching a unspellable name...

"Would 2 clicks, a whistle and smoochy sound Doss please raise his hand?"

Sam's Graduation

Sam is my youngest child. He is 5 years old. Yesterday he was in a Pre-Kindergarten Graduation ceremony. I have to admit that I was feeling a bit misty on the way over to his daycare. Next year he will be in Kindergarten and somehow I just can't get used to the idea that things change, and my baby is growing up.

The weather was not helping. It was raining and sunny, and it just made everything seem a little bizarre.

The rain let up and I had to make a left turn. Over my shoulder I caught a glimpse of a rainbow, so I pulled my beat up truck over to the side of the road and took the picture above. It reminded me that there is good in everything, even when times are confusing.

I continued on my way and once again fell into the familiar pattern of hurrying up to wait, and became caught up in all that was going on around me. You never know when you will be surprised by the unexpected. I thought I had reached my surprise limit for the day.

Then the ceremony began. Each child took turns and stood up in front of our little group and told what he or she would like to be when they grow up. Here is what Sam said...

And a priceless memory was made... He is going to be just like his father- a dreamer. I am so proud!

Sam's Mural

There is no such thing as Karma Bonus points with your children. You do something because you said you would, or maybe because it is the right thing to do, but there is no "Kid Karma Bank."

Months ago I told my children that I would paint whatever they wanted me to paint on their walls. It has taken a long time, mostly because I am lazy, and I still have another room to paint.

Sammy wanted a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. I just finished painting the mural today after being partially up there for a week.

As soon as I finished he said, "Dad, can you paint a Power Ranger up there beside it?"

"Sure baby, right after I finish your sister's room," I said.



This is a time lapse video I shot of the painting.

This is the final painting.