VSTE Island

Over the past 9 months I have been involved in setting up an island in Second Life for the Virginia Society for Technology in Education (VSTE). It has been a wonderful experience. I have met many new people, and expanded my technology and interpersonal skill sets.

But lately a couple of personal problems have popped up that have really been bothering me. You see, as a member of the group that has been involved in setting up this island, I am getting interviewed. By itself, that is not a concern.

I can talk in front of cameras and into audio recording devices, and sometimes I even almost sound like I know what is going on, which is nice. The issue is that I annoy myself. When I listen to myself, I think things like, "How many times can you say Um in a sentence? Idiot."

Perhaps I should have paid better attention in the public speaking class I had in college and not treated it like a joke. But really, how serious can you take a class that you can't fail? The only class that was easier was Weight Lifting. You record your progress and do an end of semester workout- A. In speech class, you stand at a podium and babble for the appropriate amount of time and you pass.

The interview that I gave for the VSTE Podcast Edge (Warning- if you try to download the video- it is very large! Patience...) really hammered home the fact that I am a "Nose Breather," or NB as I now refer to this affliction. This interview was done in Second Life and I was using a headset with a mic while the interviewer was recording a movie with his screen capture software.

I first figured out that I had this problem when I was doing some screen capture video clips for a Second Life video on Jamestown. Knowing I had this problem, I tried to breathe through my mouth in the interview, but I can still hear it.

I find my own NBing very annoying. The funny thing is that I have never really noticed anyone else doing it, so discovering that it was a problem, and thinking that I was the only one who had it, was very troublesome. I think I really started NBing after I stopped smoking. I found that I could actually breathe out of my nose and so I must have figured that it was something I wanted to get really good at. I breathe in before I speak- that is when the issue is most pronounced. So, it goes like this- deep breath in through the nose, with maybe a little whistle, then, "Yes, I like to go walking with my dog...."

I think my on camera skills are much better only because I can't hear the NBing. But just barely... I was interviewed on the local VBTV show- Access Virginia Beach (Under the embedded Windows Media File click- View Specific Segments for this video, and Click #12). In this segment I tried to suppress my natural head bobbing movements and facial expressions and ended up looking like I was about to fall asleep.

Over acting comes natural to me. Behaving normally does not, and when I try to be normal, people ask me if something is wrong. I can be the fool, but can I be Mr. Serious? Doesn't seem that way.

Recently, I was interviewed for a group of ITRT's in the western part of Virginia in Second Life. Since I am the member of a group, I tried to participate and answer one or two questions, but for the most part I tried to stay quiet. I just hid behind my avatar and and used the back channeling of the chat window. I felt like this one went better but I did not see it from the interviewer's perspective.

The most remarkable thing of all is that anyone would actually care about what I have to say. My children listen when I say, "Let's go get a Slurpee!" And my dog hears me when I say, "Wanna go for a run?" That it is pretty much it.

I am not used to saying things that are important to others... Maybe I should practice saying important things and then I won't annoy myself any longer. Probably not!

Fortunately, it seems like interview time is finished for me. While I would rather work on speaking like Captain Kirk, I think I just need to learn to breathe in through my mouth and try to act like a more normalized version of myself. Maybe I can channel the emotionless Data from Star Trek who fakes emotions to fit in with people. Or, I could just stay away from recording devices when someone wants the serious me and say things like, "I have no comment at this time."

Walter Mitty? Not quite.

I have always identified myself with the character Walter Mitty from the movie, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, starring Danny Kay. The short story is nice too, but I love Danny Kaye, and the movie is so much better.

If you are not familiar with the story, it is about a man with a normal life and an abnormal ability to have heroic daydreams. Any real world event can trigger a fantasy with Mr. Mitty as the star who saves the day.

I am not quite the daydreamer that Mr. Mitty was, but I have an annoying habit of making up stories about my own life that sound surprisingly like movies that I have seen. My kids hate that. We will be watching a movie as a family and I will start off with, "You know, that is a lot like how your mom and I met. You remember honey... I was the super strong super hero, and you were the free wheeling stretchy girl. Battling villains side by side. But then we were forced to settle down and hide out, never revealing our secret identities to anyone. Remember that sweetheart (in case you are wondering, I am describing The Incedibles)?" By this time all three of my kids are yelling at me to stop.

This is wonderful entertainment to me. Sometimes I will mix stories together like, An Officer and a Gentleman and Top Gun and see if I can confuse my wife who tries to keep up with me. This little game of mine can come into play at anytime, and any place. Outsiders overhearing this storytelling will surely think I have lost my senses, maybe they are right, but I will continue this game. It has nothing to do with me being unsatisfied with my life. I have a wonderful life. I just think telling these stories is funny.

Knowing this about myself, it is shocking to find out that I am having the hardest time understanding Second Life. There are few rules and you can be whatever you want to be. Yesterday I met a lady in SL named Pearl. I just started talking to her, and she being the more experienced SL'er, recognized that I was a noobie. Soon she just starting giving me stuff. Clothes, skins, hair and even some bling. She was very into having me change my look. I must admit to feeling just a little like a dress up doll. It was nice that she helped me but my outward appearance is not very important to me, even in SL.

My real life is filled with fantasy, but Second Life has none? Shouldn't it be the other way around? I suppose the real problem is that I insist on labeling the experience instead of just accepting it as it is.