Saturday, May 14, 2011

End of the World?



The End Of The World As We Know It

The promise of an uncertain future has never been more intimidating. After reading yet again that there are some
people who believe that the world will end on May 21st of this year, I had to ask myself, “Why did I buy those Jimmy Buffett tickets?”

I have never seen Jimmy Buffett live and I thought they would be a great Mother’s Day gift for my wife. But I had heard this rumor of the end of the world. What was I thinking? The Buffett concert is supposed to be on May 26th. If anyone is still alive, that would be a great time of tribulation for the remaining population of the earth. I picture fire, panic in the streets, looting, random acts of violence, and general unpleasantness. That would hardly be the time for a
Cheeseburger in Paradise, or a visit to Margaritaville, even if Jimmy and my wife and I are still alive.

If the world really does end, I won’t get a chance to get the awesome
Captain America Slurpee cups (Movie in theaters July 22, 2011) that are sure to be coming right after all of the Thor cups are bought up at the 7-11 stores. I am working very hard to keep an updated super hero plastic cup collection going. I have had to fight my wife to keep them, and now Armageddon? That doesn’t seem fair.

I wonder why the followers of
Harold Camping would latch on this doomsday prediction. Mr. Camping had already predicted that the world would end in 1994, and here we are in 2011 for his next attempt. How many times is ok to get this kind of thing wrong? Maybe it’s the three strike rule and then after that he will be ignored.

I have many questions about this idea of the end of the world. Certainly one day the world will end. But
what about the Mayans? I don’t understand why someone would choose to believe that the world will end a week from now and then sell all their belongings and try to convince others. Why not save up your money and throw a huge end of the world party on some tropical island? They could invite all their friends and then when they are all taken up to heaven, they will be easier to find since they will be together.

What will happen on Sunday, May 22nd? The continuation of natural disasters on a biblical scale? Or will Mr. Camping get to pick a new date?

I choose to believe that I will get more than one of the new Captain America cups. It is a small attainable goal if I am still around, something that will make me happy. If I am going to pick something bigger to believe in, then I look forward to world peace, space travel, and a positive ending to all of humanity’s problems. Maybe my ideas are as
crazy as Mr. Camping’s. Either way, can we just hold off on the destruction until after Buffett? It is just 5 more days, and I can give up on the cups…